TELECOM

TELECOM

From: Bill Lacewell (blacewel@SYSTEMA.WESTARK.EDU)
Subject:JOKE-CLEAN: Telecommunications Dictionary
Date: Fri, 25 Aug 1995 14:21:07 -0500

TELECOMMUNICATIONS DICTIONARY

Modem
What landscapers do to dem lawns.

Token Ring
A virtual engagement gift.

Ethernet
A device for catching the Ether Bunny.

DataPac
A size 14 girl in a size 8 bikini.

Asynch
A place to wash your hands.

Bysnch
The place where Elton John washes his hands.

BBS
Tall tales told by insects that produce honey.

ASCII
The ancient god of telecommunications. Rumored to give vast amounts of
data to believers. Hence, the phrase "ASCII and you shall receive."

Block Parity
One heck of a good time.

Carrier Detect
Raison d'etre for premarital blood tests.

File Transfer
Procedure followed by INFORMATION CENTER staff who are tired of their
present jobs.

Hayes Compatible
Prone to riding with a grizzled old cowhand who sings off-key. Gene
Autry is the industry standard.

Serial Interface
A spoon.

Terminal Emulation
A function performed by a canary that lays on its back with its legs
in the air.

X-Modem
A device on the losing end of an encounter with lightning.

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