Excuses

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Excuses

Excuses
A college professor had just finished explaining an important research project
to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for
passing his class, and that there could be only two acceptable excuses for being
late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student's
immediate family.

A smart-ass student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up.
"But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?"

As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students had
finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look.

"Well," he responded, "I guess you'll just have to learn to write with your
other hand."





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  1. [page] 1980
  2. [page] 2BILL
  3. [page] 30years
  4. [page] AAGENT
  5. [page] ABCOST
  6. [page] ACCIDENT
  7. [page] ADAMEVE
  8. [page] ADMINIST
  9. [page] ADS
  10. [page] ADTOAST
  11. [page] AIRFORCE
  12. [page] AMY
  13. [page] ANALOGY
  14. [page] ANGELS
  15. [page] AOL
  16. [page] AOLUSER
  17. [page] AOOL
  18. [page] APPLICAT
  19. [page] AREA
  20. [page] ARIANE
  21. [page] ARM
  22. [page] B9TH
  23. [page] BABY
  24. [page] BARBIE
  25. [page] BART
  26. [page] BAT
  27. [page] BEAST
  28. [page] BEER
  29. [page] BEERJES
  30. [page] BEEROS
  31. [page] BEPROG
  32. [page] BFRIEND
  33. [page] BGOLF
  34. [page] BIBLEPUB
  35. [page] BIBWIFE
  36. [page] BILLY
  37. [page] BIO
  38. [page] BISON
  39. [page] BLOOD
  40. [page] BOAT
  41. [page] BOOK
  42. [page] BOOKTITL
  43. [page] BORGBARB
  44. [page] BOSS
  45. [page] BRAINS
  46. [page] BRIGHTS
  47. [page] BROWNIES
  48. [page] BULLETIN
  49. [page] BURGER
  50. [page] BUSMAN
  51. [page] BUSTRIP
  52. [page] C
  53. [page] CAKE
  54. [page] CAKESALE
  55. [page] CAPONE
  56. [page] CARDS
  57. [page] CARPE
  58. [page] CARS
  59. [page] CARTOON
  60. [page] CASTAWAY
  61. [page] CAT12DAY
  62. [page] CATALOG
  63. [page] CATDOOR
  64. [page] CATDUCK
  65. [page] CATMEN
  66. [page] CATMIND
  67. [page] CATNET
  68. [page] CATPILL
  69. [page] CATS
  70. [page] CATTEST
  71. [page] CATVET
  72. [page] CATWASH
  73. [page] CATXMAS
  74. [page] CCHAIN
  75. [page] CCOMP
  76. [page] CHEMANAL
  77. [page] CHILDSYN
  78. [page] CHIPMUNK
  79. [page] COBOL
  80. [page] COLLEGEL
  81. [page] COMET
  82. [page] COMPACRO
  83. [page] COMPAQ
  84. [page] COMPGEEK
  85. [page] COMPLAB
  86. [page] COMPLIST
  87. [page] COMPNAME
  88. [page] COMPPOEM
  89. [page] COMPPOSS
  90. [page] CONFPROF
  91. [page] COURT
  92. [page] COURT2
  93. [page] COW
  94. [page] CPROG
  95. [page] CRAZYCAT
  96. [page] CREATION
  97. [page] CUPHOLD
  98. [page] CUSTSERV
  99. [page] CYBERSEX
  100. [page] DAEMON
  101. [page] DAN AI
  102. [page] DARK
  103. [page] DATAWIN
  104. [page] DAVE
  105. [page] DDCOMP
  106. [page] DEEPTHTS
  107. [page] DELKEY
  108. [page] DENTIST
  109. [page] DETERIOR
  110. [page] DISKCARE
  111. [page] DNA
  112. [page] DOCVET
  113. [page] DOGCOMP
  114. [page] DOGNAME
  115. [page] DOGRULES
  116. [page] DOGUND
  117. [page] DOMA
  118. [page] DONKEY
  119. [page] DOSBOOT
  120. [page] DOSHIST
  121. [page] DOUBLESP
  122. [page] DREAM
  123. [page] DRIVING
  124. [page] DRIVTEST
  125. [page] DSTAR
  126. [page] DUBAWARD
  127. [page] DUCK
  128. [page] DUMBDIE
  129. [page] DUMBSCI
  130. [page] DUSEX
  131. [page] EASTERBE
  132. [page] EDLET
  133. [page] EEL
  134. [page] EINCAT
  135. [page] ELEVATOR
  136. [page] ELVIS
  137. [page] ENGADAPT
  138. [page] ENGCOOK
  139. [page] ENGHELL
  140. [page] ENGLISH
  141. [page] ESKETCH
  142. [page] FB
  143. [page] FBIPIZZA
  144. [page] FEMAGEN
  145. [page] FINALLST
  146. [page] FINALS
  147. [page] FIRST
  148. [page] FLOOD
  149. [page] FLY
  150. [page] FOOTBALL
  151. [page] FQUOTES
  152. [page] FREEMONY
  153. [page] FRIARS
  154. [page] FUCK
  155. [page] GAMMA
  156. [page] GAYAIR
  157. [page] GAYMARR
  158. [page] GEEKDATE
  159. [page] GEEKTALK
  160. [page] GENERATN
  161. [page] GERBIL
  162. [page] GILLIGAN
  163. [page] GINGRINC
  164. [page] GIRAFFE
  165. [page] GLOVES
  166. [page] GOLDDIG
  167. [page] GOOFS
  168. [page] GOVT
  169. [page] GOVVIES
  170. [page] GREENHAM
  171. [page] GUYSSAY
  172. [page] HAIKU
  173. [page] HAIRCUT
  174. [page] HANG
  175. [page] HAWLEY
  176. [page] HEADLINE
  177. [page] HFB
  178. [page] HISTORY
  179. [page] HIWAY
  180. [page] HMMM
  181. [page] HOGS
  182. [page] HOMO
  183. [page] HOOPLA
  184. [page] HOTLINE
  185. [page] HOUNDS
  186. [page] HPOKEY
  187. [page] HSIGNS
  188. [page] HWLET
  189. [page] IKEA
  190. [page] INFOHWY
  191. [page] INS
  192. [page] INSTRUCT
  193. [page] IRHAP
  194. [page] ISLAND
  195. [page] ITALY
  196. [page] ITO
  197. [page] IWANTYOU
  198. [page] JABBER
  199. [page] JESUS
  200. [page] JOB
  201. [page] JOBGUIDE
  202. [page] KIDAXIOM
  203. [page] KIDCOMP
  204. [page] KIDLOVE
  205. [page] KIDSCI
  206. [page] KIDTAX
  207. [page] KNOWREP
  208. [page] KRYTEN
  209. [page] LABELS
  210. [page] LANGUAGE
  211. [page] LAWS
  212. [page] LEAK
  213. [page] LETTERS
  214. [page] LOVELTR
  215. [page] LUSERS
  216. [page] MADONNA
  217. [page] MALL
  218. [page] MAMMOGRA
  219. [page] MANMACH
  220. [page] MANNERS
  221. [page] MANREQ
  222. [page] MANSEX
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  224. [page] MAXREBO
  225. [page] MCHILD
  226. [page] MDOGS
  227. [page] MEAT
  228. [page] MEDTERMS
  229. [page] MENPREG
  230. [page] MENSROOM
  231. [page] METWIFE
  232. [page] MICELEGS
  233. [page] MICH
  234. [page] MICROCAR
  235. [page] MICROSEX
  236. [page] MILK
  237. [page] MILSPEC
  238. [page] MITEVAL
  239. [page] MKTCARD
  240. [page] MMS
  241. [page] MOON
  242. [page] MORIACC
  243. [page] MOSLEM
  244. [page] MOUSEBAL
  245. [page] MS
  246. [page] MSBASH
  247. [page] MSBORG
  248. [page] MSCHURCH
  249. [page] MST3K
  250. [page] MSTOAST
  251. [page] MSUICIDE
  252. [page] MUD
  253. [page] MVS
  254. [page] NAKED
  255. [page] NAVAJO
  256. [page] NAVY
  257. [page] NETASK
  258. [page] NETGEEK
  259. [page] NETLORE
  260. [page] NEWDEFS
  261. [page] NEWMEX
  262. [page] NEWT
  263. [page] NEWTON
  264. [page] NJAPP
  265. [page] NOSMOKE
  266. [page] NOTES
  267. [page] NOTICE
  268. [page] OBNET
  269. [page] OFF
  270. [page] OLYMPICS
  271. [page] OPCODES
  272. [page] PACKINST
  273. [page] PACKLINC
  274. [page] PAINTER
  275. [page] PARDICT
  276. [page] PARENTS
  277. [page] PARPREP
  278. [page] PASSAWAY
  279. [page] PBJ
  280. [page] PBS
  281. [page] PCPHRASE
  282. [page] PCSANTA
  283. [page] PCTERMS
  284. [page] PCXMAS
  285. [page] PENISENV
  286. [page] PEPSI
  287. [page] PERLSEX
  288. [page] PETRESOL
  289. [page] PFATHER
  290. [page] PHYSHELL
  291. [page] PIZZA
  292. [page] PLEDGE
  293. [page] POCKETS
  294. [page] POLCREAT
  295. [page] POLITCOW
  296. [page] PRIEST
  297. [page] PROBFORM
  298. [page] PRODMAN
  299. [page] PROFS
  300. [page] PROPLAWS
  301. [page] PROVEIT
  302. [page] PSALT
  303. [page] PSYCH
  304. [page] QUEST
  305. [page] RABBIT
  306. [page] RAVEN
  307. [page] REALBOOK
  308. [page] REDNECK
  309. [page] RELAY
  310. [page] RELCATS
  311. [page] RENTAL
  312. [page] REPAIR
  313. [page] REPUBLIC
  314. [page] RESOLUTI
  315. [page] RESUMES
  316. [page] RETIRE
  317. [page] RITA
  318. [page] ROACHES
  319. [page] ROOMMATE
  320. [page] ROOSTER
  321. [page] ROXANNE
  322. [page] RTFM
  323. [page] RUMCAKE
  324. [page] SANTA
  325. [page] SARA
  326. [page] SAYNO
  327. [page] SBOOKS
  328. [page] SCHOOL
  329. [page] SEINFELD
  330. [page] SESAME
  331. [page] SEUSS
  332. [page] SEUSSPUR
  333. [page] SEX45
  334. [page] SEXDIET
  335. [page] SEXFACTS
  336. [page] SEXLAWS
  337. [page] SEXMANUA
  338. [page] SEXQUIZ
  339. [page] SEXSTORY
  340. [page] SEXSYM
  341. [page] SFACTS
  342. [page] SGEL
  343. [page] SHAKES
  344. [page] SHIFTFAQ
  345. [page] SHMEAR
  346. [page] SHOWER
  347. [page] SIGNS
  348. [page] SKIER
  349. [page] SMEMO
  350. [page] SMITHLET
  351. [page] SMITHSON
  352. [page] SNATIV
  353. [page] SNIGLETS
  354. [page] SOAP
  355. [page] SPARROW
  356. [page] STEINEM
  357. [page] STRESS
  358. [page] SUBLIM
  359. [page] SUBTITLE
  360. [page] SUICIDE
  361. [page] SWIMMER
  362. [page] SWSEX
  363. [page] SYSADMIN
  364. [page] SYSOP
  365. [page] TACS
  366. [page] TAX
  367. [page] TBALL
  368. [page] TECHIE
  369. [page] TEDDY
  370. [page] TELECOM
  371. [page] TENCOMM
  372. [page] TENURE
  373. [page] TESTS
  374. [page] TFAIRY
  375. [page] THANKYOU
  376. [page] THEPLAN
  377. [page] THINK
  378. [page] THOUGHTS
  379. [page] TOASTER
  380. [page] TODDIET
  381. [page] TOOLS
  382. [page] TPDEV
  383. [page] TQUEST
  384. [page] TRAVELTI
  385. [page] TREE
  386. [page] TREK
  387. [page] UNIXC
  388. [page] UNIXCMD
  389. [page] UNIXJOKE
  390. [page] UNIXUSER
  391. [page] UNIXWORL
  392. [page] UNIXXMAS
  393. [page] UNPROD
  394. [page] UPBEAT
  395. [page] USERTYPE
  396. [page] VERSIONS
  397. [page] VI
  398. [page] VIRUSES
  399. [page] VIRUSMAN
  400. [page] VSECRET
  401. [page] WALKMAN
  402. [page] WC
  403. [page] WCLEAN
  404. [page] WDOGS
  405. [page] WEBADD
  406. [page] WEBOD
  407. [page] WEIRD
  408. [page] WEREWOLF
  409. [page] WHISKEY
  410. [page] WINCHRIS
  411. [page] WISDOM
  412. [page] WM10
  413. [page] WOMENSAY
  414. [page] WORLDEND
  415. [page] WRITEC
  416. [page] WRITING
  417. [page] WSD
  418. [page] WVIRUS
  419. [page] WVRES
  420. [page] XMASFAQ
  421. [page] XMASFILE
  422. [page] XMASSCI
  423. [page] XSONGS
  424. [page] XSONG AN
  425. [page] XTIAN
  426. [page] YEAR
  427. [page] YODA
  428. [page] YODASONG
  429. [page] Abooks
  430. [page] Acme
  431. [page] Actmovie
  432. [page] Adamcat
  433. [page] Adameve2
  434. [page] Adameve3
  435. [page] Addvi
  436. [page] Alares
  437. [page] Alcoholwarning
  438. [page] Amish
  439. [page] Anagrams
  440. [page] Astrolog
  441. [page] Aussiewild
  442. [page] Autopun
  443. [page] Awol
  444. [page] Bambigun
  445. [page] Baywatch
  446. [page] Bcube
  447. [page] Beforecomp
  448. [page] Bgbruss
  449. [page] Billbeast
  450. [page] Bingo
  451. [page] Bisbrain
  452. [page] Breadkills
  453. [page] Breastmilk
  454. [page] Budfrog
  455. [page] Buypaint
  456. [page] Califdiary
  457. [page] Catail
  458. [page] Catclaw
  459. [page] Catconverter
  460. [page] Catdiet
  461. [page] Cathaiku
  462. [page] Cathat
  463. [page] Catmeals
  464. [page] Catrule2
  465. [page] Cbooks
  466. [page] Celdeath
  467. [page] Chachi
  468. [page] Child80s
  469. [page] Childcom
  470. [page] Cigar
  471. [page] Circusduck
  472. [page] Comphaiku
  473. [page] Compjarg
  474. [page] Compmf
  475. [page] Compxmas
  476. [page] Corpapes
  477. [page] Corpmemo
  478. [page] Countries
  479. [page] Cperil
  480. [page] Cutekids
  481. [page] Dam
  482. [page] Darwin97
  483. [page] Deadmail
  484. [page] Decoy
  485. [page] Directoryinq
  486. [page] Disappoint
  487. [page] Divinecomp
  488. [page] Dnapers
  489. [page] Doctorchild
  490. [page] Dogbreeds
  491. [page] Dogjob
  492. [page] Driveinsane
  493. [page] Drnotes
  494. [page] Dummies
  495. [page] Earache
  496. [page] Engmanagers
  497. [page] Enlarge
  498. [page] Excuses
  499. [page] Femkinds
  500. [page] Firm
  501. [page] Fromnj
  502. [page] Fromnj2
  503. [page] Gaycartoon
  504. [page] Gaydisc
  505. [page] Geekcar
  506. [page] Geektheo
  507. [page] Gendercomm
  508. [page] Genderwork
  509. [page] Gengreet
  510. [page] Girlfrnd
  511. [page] Glitter
  512. [page] Godscandl
  513. [page] Godskids
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  515. [page] Greekgifts
  516. [page] Grill
  517. [page] Gullible
  518. [page] Gutfart
  519. [page] Hamletcat
  520. [page] Harleywomen
  521. [page] Heshe
  522. [page] Hist2
  523. [page] Homeontheweb
  524. [page] Horsechick
  525. [page] Hotelphone
  526. [page] Howinst
  527. [page] Idiotcontra
  528. [page] Idiotlabel
  529. [page] Ielinux
  530. [page] Ievirus
  531. [page] Induhvid
  532. [page] Installsoftware
  533. [page] Interlight
  534. [page] Irishtoast
  535. [page] Jellydiver
  536. [page] Jesussaves
  537. [page] Jmoore
  538. [page] Ken
  539. [page] Kenbarb
  540. [page] Kidslearn
  541. [page] Kingleer
  542. [page] Klingonprog
  543. [page] Latin
  544. [page] Laundryday
  545. [page] Lblawyer
  546. [page] Leprosy
  547. [page] Letterd
  548. [page] Lovecake
  549. [page] Macdevil
  550. [page] Maketenure
  551. [page] Makingcakes
  552. [page] Manfriend
  553. [page] Marypopp
  554. [page] Mathschool
  555. [page] Mcdonnell
  556. [page] Medmemo
  557. [page] Mentrans
  558. [page] Menway
  559. [page] Mflwebst
  560. [page] Miass
  561. [page] Microcoke
  562. [page] Microwait
  563. [page] Monicacomm
  564. [page] Moretechsupp
  565. [page] Movesouth
  566. [page] Movielessons
  567. [page] Mstvdin
  568. [page] Nerdseas
  569. [page] Nightstand
  570. [page] Ntmoney
  571. [page] Numbeast
  572. [page] Nymag
  573. [page] Octopus
  574. [page] Oschicken
  575. [page] Palmer
  576. [page] Pants
  577. [page] Pardef
  578. [page] Parrots
  579. [page] Pattiwhack
  580. [page] Pc12days
  581. [page] Pcunix
  582. [page] Perfcpl
  583. [page] Phead
  584. [page] Philly
  585. [page] Popfresh
  586. [page] Prayer
  587. [page] Prayers
  588. [page] Prisonwork
  589. [page] Progevol
  590. [page] Projman
  591. [page] Punsigns
  592. [page] Pupil
  593. [page] Qmodo
  594. [page] Queenflight
  595. [page] Rabhunt
  596. [page] Rapsong
  597. [page] Reaganair
  598. [page] Reclett
  599. [page] Redjedi
  600. [page] Relgolf
  601. [page] Remember
  602. [page] Resume
  603. [page] Richbill
  604. [page] Rphrases
  605. [page] Samstarwars
  606. [page] Santatoday
  607. [page] Santawoman
  608. [page] Scot
  609. [page] Secure
  610. [page] Shakeins
  611. [page] Slkbooks
  612. [page] Slogans
  613. [page] Smartdog
  614. [page] Southernsay
  615. [page] Spellchk
  616. [page] Starchain
  617. [page] Startfinish
  618. [page] Starwarstitanic
  619. [page] Statemottoes
  620. [page] Stateslogans
  621. [page] Strayrules
  622. [page] Stressrel
  623. [page] Tamagot
  624. [page] Techcalls
  625. [page] Telemkt
  626. [page] Tennec
  627. [page] Texas
  628. [page] Thebet
  629. [page] Travagt
  630. [page] Treklife
  631. [page] Truestupidity
  632. [page] Twister
  633. [page] Unigrade
  634. [page] Userology
  635. [page] Vagday
  636. [page] Vbride
  637. [page] Vday
  638. [page] Wbread
  639. [page] Webarchitect
  640. [page] Whotrek
  641. [page] Win2bit
  642. [page] Win98liner
  643. [page] Winsuit
  644. [page] Wiscapp
  645. [page] Womdict
  646. [page] Womworld
  647. [page] Xenacard
  648. [page] Xmas9liv
  649. [page] Xmaslegal
  650. [page] Xturkey
  651. [page] Y2kcomp
  652. [page] Y2kgilligan